Saturday, June 9, 2012

Deity, free my soul

Amongst thousand’s footsteps noise I could identify yours alone though I know not the reason and today it was just yours alone how I could miss guessing.  I stood nearby the one which transports you – a non living combination of metals – with all the love I have towards you, I was talking with it about my love towards you, it listened without complaints as if I am in love with it which is of course true because it transports you, which showed me some light when it was dark and when I was waiting for you, which you do not want to do.  

I was about to place my hand on it, just to soothe my soul, the only things which might placed me in tranquility as the day was not so good.   My inner voice stopped me ‘do not touch’.  I didn’t have time to ask why because the voice didn’t stop with that it said ‘cannot you feel something!’  Yes I felt something, my pondering heart which slips a beat with the feel I had and world around me stopped rotating for a minute since my head is rotating.  I know she is there around, very nearby but how did I know? Is that is just an intuition or the miracle of love reveals itself when you’re near to your soul mate?  Before I ask thousand questions to my intuition, I remembered I promised ‘I am walking out of your sight’ and when I lifted my head I saw her walking towards, miracles exist.  Now what should I do! Walk out of her sight or stay there to tell her I cannot fake, you cannot walk out of my brain.  

‘What do you think I would do when you walk towards me like a drop of water falling from a rose petal, like the drizzle after a hot sunny hour?  Like the sun light entering the dew at dawn to make it shine!  What do you think I would do when I was longing to see that black moon and reddish stars which you hold?  Though I stay away I am sticking to you like the invisible string which holds the moon to stick with the earth to not to get the moon lost in the space.’

I was stuck in the limbo, either to wait or give up, either to look at or get lost, either stay or walk.  It was a war between my heart and brain.  Brain said walk away she might not like your stay, heart said wait you will not get another day close to her like this.  Finally brain won the war, I have to walk away though my heart tugged an invisible sting with her and my brain used its elasticity.

‘An arrow stuck my rib, the cage where my heart stays.  You turned away from me.  I am not a demon.  You turned away from me like a Goddess turning away from an atheist.  I may need to get out the tissues in which my soul is caged to prove I will wait for another incarnation, you can still avoid me, turn away from me.’

I walked out of her sight, moving fast in air.  It was a tough evening, with heavy pressure of earth’s love towards moon to make the salt water angel to sigh heavily often.

I saw moon coming out of its black bedspread slowly, soothing every poet’s heart and triggering their brain.  I am not a poet to care about it still I do not know why she –moon – always tries to prove that she is beautiful then my angel though she cannot do so, so far.  

‘Hey’ she called me.

‘What’ I replied.

‘What happened’ she interrupted me.

‘I don’t have space for you, why cannot you disturb some poet who believes that you are the beautiful and who haven’t seen my angel’ I replied

‘I am not disturbing you, come by, let us have a chat’ she said

‘No mood, please get away’ I replied

‘2 min’ she said

‘Alright’ I accepted.

The next moment something pulled me from the ground.  When I opened my eye I was standing on a black sheet of foam – a moving cloud, floating in the air.  Moon shone like hell, it took few seconds for convexity of my eye lens to adjust to the shining.  It was dead silent in the space; motion of the cloud mourned as if I am lying dead on it.  She started talking.

‘When everybody loves me, why do not you? I am the beautiful than any woman born on earth.  I made poets, writers, lovers, scientists, and I represent the so-called beauty’ she said.

‘That’s too much of vanity you hold.  I know a better moon.  You are kept in your place by earth without which you might be just an asteroid wandering around burning.  You can shine only in night when sun – the master – cannot see you and you steal the light from earth and still you bluff with vanity, shame on you.  I know a better moon, in fact she is a universe and you are just a dust particle in the universe.  No shadow could hide her shining, no earth required to enlighten her, she glows in day, she is the queen of the fairy world, nobody could attract her, and I always have a invisible thread tagged with her and she keeps me in my place, in a distance so that her beauty doesn’t destroy me.  She’s an angel, my angel’ I replied.

‘I do not steal light from the earth, I reflect the love, and I reflect the love of sun towards earth who keeps a distance so that His – the sun – beauty doesn’t destroy the earth.  I reflect the love of the master – the sun; I reflect the beauty of that love, the love which makes poets, lovers, writers and many a times humans.  And that is why I say I am beautiful than any woman born on earth’, she said.

‘Okay, I confess, I like you, you’re beautiful, you’re the reflection of love but she is not just a women born on this earth, she is the reflection of my soul, reflection of goddess of wealth – Copia – a deity’ I argued.

‘It’s time, you can go back’ she said with humiliation.

I thought of jumping from the cloud. 

She shouted ‘stop’. 

I asked ‘what?’

‘You are right, she just reached her home, I saw while she uncovered her face.  I have fallen in love with her, she is a deity –  Copia – and I remember you both, centuries back, as one soul, I pray one day she will realize it, wait for the time to reveal it’s secret’ she consoled me

‘Love you, but not more than her’ I replied with a flying kiss.  She smiled.

I opened my eyes to see in between metallic chaos on my way back home.

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