Unspoken...

  A musical anklet continued talking in a rhythm disturbing my sleep,  I procrastinated it for a long time vacillating to hear it but could not keep it prolonged thus it waked me up from my deep sleep and put me in a sleepy state of trance.  Acoustic of the anklet in the rhythm of heart kept sounding not very fast also slowed its pace not.  It is an unusual place which I seen not once in my dream or the somewhere I visited.  It was not an open space nor a close cabinet but a place where nightingales sang along with the anklet and fireflies lit the room with its luminescent light.  The air looked as if the Mother Nature itself has camouflaged herself in a small room for us.

 

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Everything looked magnificent except my heart and its beats.  The acoustics surround soothed my throbbing mildly but it has given not heal to a great extent.  It all seemed to be happening in a fantasy world but I learnt it is not.  She sat next to me with slight sadness in her eyes and anger in her countenance.  The beat of the anklet continued that which reminds me the day I met her.  She turned to look at my worry bound face but without giving any sign of console she turned to look straight.  She knows everything I do though she kept avoiding me to near her, though she kept me away from listening to her voice, though she kept me away from all the happenings around her, I know, she kept a eye on all that I did.  She believed me that I would go not in a different direction that of hers, divulging from the path of divine love to abyss.  And now she learnt she could not tame me to seed the saplings of relation that is suppose to last long for till I die my last death.

Leaning over my shoulder she held my hand and clenched my fingers with hers.  I was entangled in her palms and shivering to smell the fragrance of beauty that she pours on my shoulder.  The clench spoke hundreds of words in the language of silence.  I could not explain my position for I misunderstood her and took a different direction.  I heeded not to my inner voice thus loosing the peace embedded in my soul.  I listened not to my instinct so lost myself in the garden of thrones and bushes.  I could not explain her for she believed me that I wont take another road that is not of where her commutation continued.

She didn't cry nor didn't I shed any tear.  She held me close to suffice my purpose of being around in this planet for the last time.  I closed my eyes leaned over her head and she on my shoulder.  I lost my fear, I lost my agonies, and I forgave myself but asked her forgiveness with a kiss on her forehead.  She nodded in acceptance of my apology and blessed me with a kiss.  We knew never again we will meet each other not even once more in this mortal world but the moment we were together is just enough for centuries together.  Number of years matters not in love but the amount of love we show each other.  Love makes us immortal and ubiquitous, and surveil over our beloved though we are not physically present.

It pained at the same time it was euphoric.  We spoke not a word but exchanged what we want to voice.  She stood and walked, I felt the pang of separation but I do deserve not to stop her for her destination is different.  She walked managing to turn not to me.  The anklet continued to sing, the fireflies continued to emit light, I continued to watch her, she continued to walk.  We continued to love.

A letter...

img from google

My love,

Thousands and thousands of dreams I hold not in my heart, my love, they were just very few, less than my fingers could count but they were not just dreams but the igniters of my soul, the-something that makes me still live around.  The inferno of my spirit, my burning soul, rips my eye lashes and brings tears in it because of the fumes it generates, wipe it not but just lend me your shoulders.

Do not hold me when I fall down, a scar one more wont make much difference to my countenance, but be around me and say ‘just a small one’.  Don’t suffer my pain, do not take it to your heart but just fondle my wounded chest and I will rise again by your care.  I knew well that my thoughts are not a stagnant water because stagnant waters generates dangerous microbes, I love to be a fierce water fall and rush like a river and finally cuddled with the immaculate ocean of love of yours, just wait for the time for me to disappear in you. 

Do not kill your dream for me because I know it hurts more that a stabbed knife in chest than to stride out from a dream.  I can be a light in your chosen path; I can hold your hands for you to commute safely.  Try not to decipher my silence because I failed to do it to myself.  It’s in silence the God manifest himself in the human hearts, it is when we hear the voice of our soul, more than any human voice I am in need of my soul to talk, to clarify my doubts.  Hundreds of questions do trouble my thoughts, and the answers I seek not from you, my love, or in anybody I know.

Few very lines, I have, to express but the-what between the lines is all I have, to speak.  My fears are hell a lot, that which makes me to go back to my womb to close my eyes from the phantoms of failures, to close my ears to eschew hearing from the demon’s talk after the effect of defeats.  Scoop me in your palms, pamper me when I am exhausted with failures tell me that you will be there to love me till I breathe my last. 

Be the first one to celebrate, my love, in case of my success for all it is for you, a dedication for the precious and stupendous love you had had for me.  There is something, I forgot to tell you; my first dream – you.

With love.

One minute in Love...

Not so furious but as fast as it could, like a spear thrown by the hands of a warrior in a urge of war, like an arrow shot from the bow of a hidden assassinator, like a kiss of a desperate lover, like the powerful light of a thunder, the same speed of blade in mid of a battle; moving her lashes slightly up she threw a saccade on me and her eyes got stuck in the entrance of light of my body – my eye lashes.

 

pic crtsy : http://www.fuelyourphotography.com

Not moving an inch from her eyes and moving not my eyes from her eyes I stared her as if looking at a sunflower bloomed in night.  Slightly I frowned when she turned away but then that doesn't put a veil to stop me peeping at her blue blend eyes.  I waited for her to turn to my side but she stooped her eyes to the edge and bowed another arrow.

Mesmerized with her sight mildly I shrugged to turn to any side.  I wondered to see the mystic mixture of love and lust in the same eyes that which emanated the light of divine energy – attraction.  Seduced by her eyes I followed her vision, at all direction she turned, hesitating to turn from her direction and putting my decorum at risk. 

Like the rays of morning sun light her brows kidnapped the glittering light from her eye balls and shined like the shadows of fire.  Every close and open of her lashes looked like the fins of a miraculous fish swimming in the deep blue see. Every kiss of the upper lash on the lower; I deciphered it has calling me close to her.  A profound meekness, proficient beauty, prolonged longing, and a divine crush I saw in those eyes that gazed me and little bit of her beauty stuck to my eyes and mixed with the lust and love I stared her like sunlight entering a drizzle and making the air colorful; making my soul beautiful.

In a minute of time thousand lines of poetry it chanted that of the force of gravity towards the opposite poll.  The source of attraction between is though unknown it felt like drinking a mug of legacy wine from the lake of miracle.  Malevolent it felt a little but the benevolence that those eyes spoke soothed the heat of guilt and blessed the heart which is little tilt. Thousands of lines it spelt the poem of beauty thus to prove that when stuck in the force of attraction and seduction there exist no space or time.

Even a word I dared to spoke not but there existed a conversation of days and months; a graceful communication and a hearty soul commutation.  Laws of nature are strange that makes us feel those are malicious on human souls but the moments like these make me feel those are acts of gracious omnipotent, act of divine presence in the lust and crush.  Only when the presence of spiritual flame is felt it burns the guilt that is held.

In a split second I closed and opened my eyes to burn the guilt, she disappeared in the air… she disappeared in the air… I smiled.

Create happiness...

A divine man who attained the stage of deathless body, the one who became the gracious light, the God himself, said to pray for the entire world and thus one’s requirement is fulfilled in it. 

No surprise why Siddhartha became Buddha while he started searching a reason for his existence and found human agonies and sufferings. 

 

crtsy : google images

I was sitting in the place where generation new is brought in to this world and was made to cry – a gynecologist’s nursing home.

When I were in search of love to suffice my burning soul rotten in my mundane life and illogical happenings, I found people with unconditional love, ready to serve the Goddesses carrying the future, in many ways and in anyways.  When I was in search of new dishes to content my tongue, I found the graceful hearts, those who serve the patients, are ready to eat that I rejected to eat and ready to waste.  When I am in need to be recognized and more money than I earn, I am seeing people in need of food little more to save for the next appetite. 

I understand now what the divine man who has become the effulgent divine light has said “Pray for the world and one’s need is sufficed in it”

While I was wondering if a grownup could really turn a baby, a kid, a toddler and I walked crossing a hospital ward where a husband sitting in his chair, next to his wife, laid on her palms crying in fear and his wife, who could not get up or move because of his off-spring in her body, caressed his head whereby she is the one who suppose to cry in fear, but, though she fears she has to take care of her grown up baby too.

Not understanding the divine process of fetus growing in the amniotic into full fledged baby and comes to this world after struggle, giving pain to its mother, many amidst us worry about the worthiness of there existence.  There exists a common goal for anybody's existence in this world, the same thing which we did to our mother after birth – create happiness.

Love is not in air or in space or in vacuum, it is generated in every mother’s womb, slowly grows and formulates head, body, legs and hands along with a alarm that beats approximately seventy two times a minute – the heart – to remind us our common goal – love one another and create happiness.

We take form because of happiness, a mutual love, taken care in womb with happiness and with everybody’s love; born and created happiness.  I don’t know why we forget to continue doing the same – create happiness and spread love.

Towards the light

…towards the light, I hear a call asking me to commute towards the fathomless spirituality.  It is the light that holds everything and anything exist in this universe and the light which is the universe by itself.

There persist a light in the fire that burns the corpse and the same that burns in the heart and glows in the eyes.  It is the same light that shines in the masterful Sun which can lighten up the earth from the morning to evening and when the earth is against the nature of universe it could pull it towards it and burn it in to ashes to spread it across the universe, marking the mistake. 

It is the light that raised a question in my heart on not of where is God, I knew the presence of God, but why is God.

It’s the light that burns intensely which melts my veins that commutes blood to my brain before it’s pumped from my heart.  It is something which pulls me towards the emptiness where nothing exists but the sprite of light, the Godly power.  Light – the inception point of everything that is created in this world and the world too.  It is the light that terminates everything that needs to be destroyed in exasperation.

It is the sprite– the light - that is understood not to it’s full. It’s beyond the religion because the power of the light in every religion in a form or the other.  It is beyond any caste or creed because it’s – light – the caste which the soul of universe that created us belongs to.  It is beyond any race or color because there is no vision to the eyes to see any color without light also it is the one that which holds all the colors.

The light is where, the doubtless sprite, the soul of the universe, the power that rules the humanity, the language of unconditional love, faith which is beyond any dogma, the God, lives.

It is the light which keeps humanity alive, the fire that burns in the soul to go for a search of something that keeps us alive, the warmth of unbeatable light which engrosses the hearts to love, to spread the Godliness in this earth.  It is the supermental power that which when brought into this earth, though it exist here, make life beautiful and earth a good place for humanity to live.

I now walk towards the light praying to burn me without even leaving the ashes in the air and burn me to escape the death, feel the heat of love, the soothing warmth of God and become just not the part of this universe but the universe itself.

How much love...

Few a minutes it took to realize for him on what he did the past half hour.  As if the respiratory organs malfunctioning the air tried its best to get in and lungs suffered its best to take oxygen from it to sooth the throbbing heart not just because of what has happened but the because of the wild running towards no where the destination is.

google images crtsy 

           

Not a good day to end with but when they sat next to next with no words to talk but with more than the enough love to exchange.  Both of them thought the heart of the other is traveling far in a different direction but they know not that there are no directions in love neither a road to stroll. When a metal crap was ready to transport them they got in with out any unusual disagreement.   She got down in her stop.  Though he heard the voice of her heart asking him to get down; he hesitated as the beats of his throbbing heart was louder than her soul’s voice. 

            He threw a message in to the air for all the angels in the atmosphere to tell her that he is longing for her, along with a text message from his mobile phone asking if she is safe in train.  Few minutes passed, she didn't show any light on his mobile phone.  He got into his train which physically carries into his place for him to sleep though virtually his soul travels in a different direction which is no different from of where she is. 

Subsided the patience, he rang her, she didn't pick.  She shouldn't have noticed, he thought.  Five minutes more passed he disturbed the air with his mobile phone again to reach her, she didn't pick.  The third time, fourth, fifth time, no response.  Slightly his rate of beat started rising.  His train blew horn and started moving, he dialed her number but she failed him again.  He got down from the moving train and started running, for a minute he did not know where he is running.  Little while his brain woke up and asked him, where the hell are you running?   He thought for no second and said, to her.  But where, how, what could have happened, is she is sitting in the station waiting for the train or something else, why the hell she not picking the bloody phone?  How many questions to answer but he has got no time, in a minute he wants to see her, else his heart would become dynamite to burst him in to pieces and pieces.

No time he gave his respiratory organs to inhale or exhale, dipped in the ice cubes of fear slowly his hands and legs went numb.  He ran wild to, a different, near by station to catch the train that takes her to home.  Reaching the station he saw the train in the opposite side, to catch, for which he has to take a foot over bridge.  Skipping how many steps he doesn't know, he ran like a wild beast in fear.  He got into the train and the questions started again, train horned, first place to run and search her in her station and then to the place where she got down from the bus, he decided.  I am not crying, nothing has happened, she is alright, he repeated with gray lines in his lashes. 

The phone beeped, just now in train. 

O! He got is life back.  Got down from the running train sat on the steps of the foot over bridge trying to catch his breathe.  He text-ed her of what has happened to show his angry.

As slow as possible he walked back to his station and got into his train and closed his eyes and leaned back in his seat to go over what has happened in past few minutes.  Breathing as hard as possible to sooth his throbbing heart he wiped his tears from the sides of his eyes, knowing not if it’s happy tears or out of fears.

The phone beeped again, why did you do that?

Because…because I am mad on you, he replied. 

Closer you are to me...

Closer you are to me, freezing the air is to me but the warmth of your love makes me stay alive with the blood frozen.  Like the finger that unconsciously shift the place from one to another to press the key of a piano you play the music of love with my nerves to pull me near to your lips and stop me before I kiss.  Never had I thought the solitude will pierce me into pieces and when I missed you next to me the chill breeze blew me away into to the space like the dust that has stuck on the life’s wall. 

I never melted down with your croon but disappeared in the space where silence is the only language love is the only force of attraction.  You woke me up from the ashes and poured me into the glass of wine and I drowned in love.

When the moon shone and threw the light on you when you walked along with me with fathomless distance of next-to-me-without-a-touch, I realized I am a lunatic, enough crazy to just watch you staying with me.   When your lips spells something unrelated to you and me, your eyes calls me to come near and take you in my arms, scoop you and walk away from this earth to a place where we and we alone could cherish, the place where you seldom wither to hold my hand and walk along.

I am bored of being young; faster, let’s grow old for I want to cherish the joy of being in your warm bosom when the cold winter wind makes me shiver.  You ate all my words and left me with just one word to pronounce – your name.

When I talk whatever I feel you heed it and put me in limbo, did I make any sense or not.  You never speak out that you feel in words but your withering fingers, shivering cheeks, glittering lips and spearing eyes talks a thousand unspoken love in the language of shy. You hide everything behind you skin and blush when I say ‘I am mad about you’.  Like spores that fly and land in another flower your thoughts from, I don’t know where, somewhere dropped in my heart and grown a tree.

The vertical limit for me to reach in love with you is higher than the sky; I could persevere but the horizontal limit which is less than an inch seems to be thousand sky’s distance.   I go wild when I miss you and get mesmerized in a split second when you spell my name.  When I said don’t leave me, though knowing it just for hours is the separation, you stayed with me to come along where ever I take you.

If you want me to live come along I can show you the paradise and if you want to leave me… if you want leave me… okay, it's tough but leave me alone right away.